6:00 am, Lewis and I arrive at the hospital. I have to say it was really surreal being there again. The last time I was there was when I left empty handed after Joy's birth. While we were waiting to check in I eyed the purple tear drops behind the desk sticking to a filing cabinet. This was a marker that was placed outside my room after Joy's birth to indicate that there was not a happy scene going on on the other side of the door. Then I heard the cry of a newborn baby. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes as the last time I was there that sounds was so heartbreaking to me because I never did get to hear that sweet sound from Joy. It was a reminder of what I was missing. Lewis had requested a specific room number like we were checking into a hotel, but they were so busy they were unable to accommodate his request. He apparently wanted the room we had when Joy was born because it was a rather large room. I personally did not want that room. Lots of feeling wrapped up in not wanting to be in that room and not sure I can express them, so I won't even try here.
I kept fighting the idea that it was a scheduled induction maybe because it was just scheduled the day before or that throughout my pregnancy my doctor kept saying that we cannot induce since I was going to be attempting a VBAC. Nevertheless, labor did not start on it's own and by the morning of Wednesday, November 4th I was two days overdue and very miserable and uncomfortable. I just simply wanted to get the show on the road, so to speak.
You have to know it was a pretty uneventful labor when the most painful and traumatic thing was when I first got there the nurse that was to go off shift in a hour was the one to try and start my IV. I have to say I never had anyone try and start my IV in a vein right near my wrist bone. OUCH! Did I say my threshold for pain is low? Okay, that poke did not work so she went on the the other wrist same spot. OUCH, again! No luck there either. She said two sticks were her limit and she called someone else in to start my IV. Success with a vein on the front of my left hand. Praise the Lord! Nothing really happened after that for some time. They wanted to start pitocin, but I questioned if we could just wait for the doc to break my water and see if I need it. So nothing was done until 7:45am when my doc arrived and broke my water and suggested the pitocin start since we were here to have a baby. I agree, but typically when my water has broke in the past my labor progressed pretty rapidly and I did not think I would need the pitocin, but I caved to my doc's advice. Contractions started not 10 minutes after that, progressing to a point over the next 30 minutes that became unbearable for me. Let's just say the anesthesiologist could not arrive quick enough to administer my epidural.
Now, normally I think of getting the epidural as the worst part of labor. Not this time. My contractions were so painful and so close together I kept asking him if he was finished. I'd let him know when I had a brief window of no contractions in hopes that he would hurry up and get the catheter in already. It seemed like it took forever. Remember, I have a low threshold for pain. Finally I got some relief. Typically in the past, my epidurals have been so remarkable in blocking pain and just about every other sensation from the waist down. This time I could wiggle my toes and feel when I was having a contraction, although there was no pain. I even felt pressure and the urge to push. Never had that feeling before while in labor. By 9:30 I was 8cm dilated and by 10:00 am I wanted to push. They kept making me wait saying that they wanted me to hold off as long as I could so that I could "labor down." Never heard that expression before. Plus, we had to wait for my doc to arrive. One whole hour later it was finally show time. I have to say that it was nice to know when to push and actually able to somewhat feel how effective my pushes were. In my labors with Elijah and Phoebe they had to tell me when to push because I could never feel a thing. A couple big pushes and a couple real tiny ones later Rhys was born. He was (and of course is still) beautiful!!
Leading up to Rhys' birth I kept thinking his birth would be so emotional for me I thought for sure I would cry this time. Out of all the births of my kids I only ever cried when Joy was born. I thought for sure I would this time out of pure happiness, but I really was just so happy and in awe that crying was not on my radar. It was pure JOY!
Needless to say, the VBAC was a success. The scar from my c-section from when Joy was born will remain in tact and forever mark where she lived inside me for 30 weeks and 1 day. A permanent, tangible reminder ...call it a tatoo of sorts if you will. This is part of the reason I did not want to have to a repeat section, not to mention awful pain and recovery time.
Rhys is such an easy going baby. He rarely cries except for when he is hungry and the occasional times when he is gassy. He had his one month appointment yesterday and has gained weight like a champ. He weighed in a 9lbs 12 oz yesterday, up from 7lbs 4oz at birth.
Proud big brother & sister!
the storm is brewing
1 year ago